Does this article surprise you? My personal observations from my experience of working in the industry of building respectful separation plans for countless of couples by way of mediation over the last 7 years, brings the content of this article below to the reality for some.
If your relationship is rocky and maybe you’ve uttered the words ‘separation’ or ‘divorce’ to your spouse, but nothing concrete has happened yet is it because you’re holding out for after the planned family vacation that’s coming up? Or are you waiting for after the summer holidays, spring break, reading week, Christmas break etc….? We often feel additional stress and are set off even easier when our relationship with our significant other is not healthy. Moving through the motions pretending to enjoy yourselves or acting as though there are no issues, can be stressful in itself.
Do you still take the family vacation to keep the peace? Do you wait until the kids are back to school and in their usual routines? There are no easy answers and not one is the same for everyone, there are those that are on good enough terms that postponing the first concrete steps towards getting a separation is possible, but for some, it only makes it worse and can ruin that family vacation for everyone if emotions flare.
School is upon us again and the summer vacations are coming to an end, the scrambling to get organized and back into routine, the shopping for back to school items, the deadlines, the schedules….. Oh my gosh! Is there any wonder why we lose our minds with all that’s going on at this time of the year?
Take a deep breath and make sure that you’re not in a “reactive” mode. If separation is inevitable, take it one step at a time.